- Cisgender is when a person’s gender is aligned with their physical sex. Broadly, people who are not trans are cisgendered.
- Cis-sexism is the belief that transsexuals identified gender is somehow inferior to people who are cisgendered.
Finding this word was like a revelation to me. Finally I had a word to describe what I had known and seen being behaved out there. Perhaps being a partner of a trans woman it has never occurred to me that anyone wold be anything but accepting and okay with it. Yes, of course there were those that feared trans people, but in my naïve mind, I thought that if they just understood it would be all better. This of course is nowhere near the truth.
Most people out the do believe that trans people are somehow less than cis people. They must have ‘chosen’ to be like that, they are freaks who want to attract attention to themselves, they aren’t real men and women. The flip side to these are the people who pathologies trans. These are people who patronisingly say that trans people can’t help it, and they should be supported and nurtured by nature of the fact that they are trans. I realise that this may make me sound uncaring and transphobic, but actually, trans people are people. They are adults who can make their own decisions and deserve to be treated as such. I agree that being trans is not a choice (and if it were who would choose to put themselves through it?) and medical treatment is involved to align the identified gender and the body it came in, but trans people deserve just as much respect as anyone else.
Where I fear cis-sexism is as a lesbian partner of a trans woman I fear that I won’t be seen as a real lesbian, on account of the fact that I’m not with a real woman. It prevents me from going out and getting involved in the scene. I won’t go out to a lesbian club unless I am certain that she’ll be accepted. I just don’t want to be in that situation. This is where I think loads of feminists get it completely wrong. Cis-sexism is just another form of elitism and acts at excluding people by virtue of their past physical history, how is that fair?